Women are Craving an Expansive Vision and Reality for their Sex Lives
For two long years, I lived in a marriage devoid of intimacy. It’s one thing to feel the routine creep into your relationship, but it’s another to find yourself staring into the void of a passionless partnership, wondering how things got so far off track. I used to lie awake at night, looking at the back of my husband’s head, silently pleading for connection, touch, anything to break the icy distance between us.
I tried everything I could think of—date nights, heartfelt conversations, little romantic gestures, and yes, initiating intimacy outright. But each time I reached out, his rejection felt like a dagger to my self-esteem. “I’m tired,” he’d say, or sometimes, “Not now.” Eventually, he didn’t need to say anything at all—his body language did the talking.
The rejection wasn’t just about the physical distance. It made me feel invisible, undesirable, and utterly alone. The person who once made me feel like I was the centre of their universe now barely noticed me.
But somewhere, deep within me, a quiet but powerful longing stirred. It was more than the need for sex or touch—it was a yearning for an expansive vision of what intimacy could be. I wanted more than the status quo. I wanted a life filled with joy, exploration, connection, and passion.
The Quiet Longing
I know I’m not alone in this longing. So many women, especially those managing busy lives—juggling careers, children, and households—feel the same way. We get caught up in the grind, in the “shoulds” of daily life, and we lose touch with our own desires.
For years, I suppressed that part of myself. I told myself it wasn’t the right time to focus on intimacy. I believed that I was being selfish for wanting more when there were so many other priorities to tend to. But the truth was, I wasn’t just longing for a better intimate life—I was longing to feel alive again.
It wasn’t until my marriage ended that I decided to take the leap and confront that longing head-on. For the first time in years, I gave myself permission to want what I wanted without guilt or shame.
Read more about the importance of a Vision for your Sex Life on my Substack Newsletter.